Here's to you.

If for one second the thought crosses your stupid little mind that I don't know what is happening here, think again.

Special for the day: Broken heart with a side of gut wrenching remorse.

Don't tell me you're just like the rest of them.

Finally.

You are the very breath I breathe.
You're kiss is my sanity.
You're embrace is my sanctuary.
You're heart is my heaven.
You're eyes are my everything.

You are who I long for. You are the love I've been looking for. You are the faith that I lost. You are the hope I believe in. You are my hero. You are who I dream for. You are who I smile for. You are everything to me. Saying "I love you" has never been so exciting as it is when I say it to you. I'm never one to stick around but for you I'd stay until my very last breath. I've never been one to trust someone but with you, you have it all. I've never been one to believe in starting over, but somehow you have taken all the wrong I've done in my life and wiped my slate clean. All of my fears and all of my insecurities won't hold me back from giving you my heart. I'm ready to give this all I have. No matter what the cost. Even if you break my heart, I'll never regret taking a chance on you. Being with you means having the whole world and all of the happiness in it at my fingertips.

"I don't want to deny my heart it's chance to feel. I don't want to deny my soul something real."
I LOVE YOU.
This I know for sure.

In the works.

You're gone. Well, you have been for a few weeks now. I've felt like I haven't been able to breathe since the funeral. Everyone tries to talk to me, I just don't want to hear anyone's voice. Not unless it's yours but I know I'm breaking my own heart by believing I'll be able to one day. Yesterday was the first time I got out of bed in a week. I didn't make it very far before I started to feel the weight of everything again and climbed right back into bed. I thought I'd try again today. I could hear the rain outside and it made me think of the day that we became "us". It was raining that day, too. I remember I ran out the door barefoot and started dancing in the driveway. You watched me jump in all the puddles and twirl around, getting soaked. You laughed and ran out to me. I could have sworn we were the only two people in the world that day. It felt like hours that we played before you pulled me inside. You grabbed my hand and led me to the bathroom... You started a warm shower for me. I remember exactly how your skin felt as you undressed me. Your lips were so soft, the moment was so perfect. You washed my hair and once we were all clean you wrapped me up in a towel. I don't know if I've ever smiled that big in my whole entire life. You pulled me into you and whispered "save that smile for me..." in my ear. I loved you then, you know. I stood in the doorway and watched the rain fall, thinking about it all. I closed my eyes and I swear I could still feel you right there with me. I took a deep breath and I ran out into the road and I danced and twirled around for you. I hope you were watching. I wish I could close my eyes, count to 3, and you would still be here. I thought about coming to be with you... where you are. And then I got scared that where you are doesn't exist, then I'd lose your memory forever. So I'll stay right here in hopes that you are up there watching me. And on every rainy day, I'll jump and twirl around for you and look for every puddle. I promise I'll never forget you. I promise I will think of you and every perfect day we spent together. You promised you'd never leave me... I hope you meant that. I pray to God that you're watching over me, now. Everyone says that time heals all wounds, so if that day ever comes where I stop hurting... I hope you're looking because I will smile. Because I've been saving it for you.